Bill Can Do It
Posted on May 29, 2010
(Washington D.C.) It was revealed today that President Barack Obama used Bill Clinton as a secret envoy to see if LeBron James would play for the Chicago Bulls. This is only the latest of revelations of the odd yet symbiotic relationship that has developed between the former President and the current occupant of the Oval Office.Of course, everyone now knows that President Obama had Rahm Emanual ask Mr. Clinton is he would ask Joe Sestak if he would take a job as Navy Secretary rather than run in a Democratic Primary against Arlen Specter. But after an extensive investigation, it can now be revealed that Obama uses Clinton far more than commonly known.
For example, Obama asked Clinton if he would ask Alex Rodriguez if he would consider a trade to play for the Chicago White Sox. Rodriguez was said to be intrigued, but negotiations broke down over the role Madonna would play in the move.
While it is well-known that Obama tapped Clinton to help him negotiate a truce between North and South Korea, it is less well known that Obama also asked Clinton to help him negotiate better prices for his purchase of several new suits by a well-known Korean tailor.
It is also common-knowledge that Obama used Clinton to influence European leaders to back a bail-out package for the Greeks, but to this point, it has been a secret that Obama asked Clinton to ask the French President Sarkozy if he would like to just kind of "hang out", especially if Monsieur Sarkozy would bring his attractive wife, Carla Bruni, next time Obama was in Paris.
Obama also asked Bill Clinton if he has any ideas about how to plug the "damn hole" in the Gulf Coast.
Obama and Clinton have not always had such a close relationship. Clinton was furious at Obama for insinuating that he was a racist during the 2008 campaign. And Obama, who once compared himself favorably to Ronald Reagan while diminishing the Clinton years as historically insignificant, reportedly thought that Clinton was nothing more than a redneck boob. But Obama's respect for Clinton has grown, especially as the current President has worked more and more with Hillary Clinton.